Recently, I had a day where I really felt at peace with my life. I want to record this so that I can read it when I have those days where I do not feel like I am good enough. On that day, I felt good enough as a wife and mother. I felt that even though the battle with screen time is very real in our home, even though I get upset sometimes, even though my house is often a mess, there is always cleaning to be done and the laundry is hardly ever all put away, etc etc etc, I am enough as a wife and mother. I am where I am supposed to be (at home with my kids), doing what I am supposed to be doing (somedays that is the bare minimum -just trying to keep sane -but I do try to be a good mother and homemaker) and working through the struggles I am supposed to be working through. I am good enough.
The 4 older kids fought for a bit this morning. There was some hitting and screaming involved between them. But then they played well together while I cooked in the kitchen for about an hour and I loved hearing them laugh and have fun with their zombie game. Elizabeth played at my feet pulling plastic plates and cups out of the kids cupboard. Now they are watching the movie Bedtimes stories and I am fine with that. I hope that, even though there is quite the age range between them, they will always stay friends. And I hope they always stay close to their cousins. In a way, cousins can be like brothers and sisters too.
Elva randomly gave me a challenge this morning. There is always room for improvement in my life and I suppose she has noticed my excess screen time as I check Instagram and Facebook daily (well, Instagram many times a day) and I like to blog or read other blogs as well. She challenged me to 5 weeks without Instagram, Facebook and blogging starting tomorrow. Then she challenged herself to 5 weeks without the Nintendo Switch, playing phone games and screaming (she screams sometimes when she is upset). I am impressed by Elva. She is still very much my little girl but I see her growing up little by little, developing more self awareness and self discipline each day. She is such an amazing young lady and she will turn out just fine!
Let's see how the next 5 weeks go. I hope I use the extra time to read more scriptures and books, go to bed earlier and exercise more. See you then. Now I am off to either play with Selman as he wanting to play or maybe I can sneak in a nap for him and Elizabeth (and maybe me 😉).
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