The Waiting Game

Well, we are in the midst of playing the waiting game. Waiting for little one to arrive that is. I am super excited! I am also nervous for childbirth... but mostly excited. This pregnancy has gone fast. Probably because I have worked quite a bit during this pregnancy. It is 2:35 in the morning and I can't sleep. Typical for 3rd trimester in pregnancy. I do kick counts and baby is okay. I have been cramping a little bit but not too bad. I had a lot more with Selman the week before he was born. At my 3:20 afternoon appointment when we first came up to Calgary on Tuesday, Dr Mirazo said I was 3 cm dilated and 40% effaced. She also said she may see me before my induction date this Friday June 19 but I am not sure. She didn't do a sweep but I did feel crampy after the appointment while Chris and I went on a walk to Princess Island Park downtown as well as to supper at a Vintage steak house downtown (to celebrate Father's Day this coming Sunday. I also got him a bike helmet for Fathers Day as well as I got some treats for Nathan and my Dad). I love them all very much (even if I don't always understand guys).

We are staying at my friend Michelle's house. She lives in our old Calgary community of Copperfield and her home seems like a second home to me. I used to watch her 2 boys here at this house along with my kids during a couple of summers. I have also slept here a few times when I have worked a few shifts in a row the Rockyview this last year. They have a nice little basement suite. Chris is with me and I am listening to him snore beside. Perhaps that is partly why I am awake too. Chris is still doing 5 online classes a day with his students from Huntsville Elementary school (he has been working there since November after finishing working at Arrowood Hutterite colony) and did that yesterday and will again do so today for the last time as school is almost done. I like to listen to him teach. He is a good teacher and has always done well at teaching me things. It was fun to walk around Princess Island Park Tuesday evening. I went on some walks yesterday around a few ponds in Copperfield and that was fun too. We have been spoiling ourselves on this little getaway and we have eaten out several times including a Thai Food place this evening. We had spicey Pad Thai and coconut soup and bubble tea. Do you think it will help bring on Labour? We talked about our missions and enjoyed the rain falling outside. It was fun.

But I am missing the kids and I feel so lonely tonight even with Chris sleeping beside me. Camellia and Mom are taking good care of them at the farm and they are having fun with their cousins but Caeleb called me in tears this evening as I think he misses us. I miss them so much. I don't think I like getaways longer than one night away from the kids. I miss Caeleb's imagination about Disneyland/Avengersland and how he makes up Disneyland around the house, Elva's warm, caring, motherly heart and seeing her take care of the others and her love for Nana, Mary's spunk, seriousness yet silliness at the same time, and playing barbies with her and Selman's mischievous grin and mommy snuggles with him. I love my children! I want to be a better mother for them. I want them to feel of my love for them. I want them to know how special they each, individually are, and how much potential they each have. They will all go far in life and I hope that they all work hard to achieve their goals. I hope they all seek for spiritual things and put the gospel of Christ and his church first in their lives. Sometimes I feel so alone in teaching them spiritual things but I hope they can feel of my testimony and know how important it is for me to have spiritual nourishment. After all, there is so much more to this life and for the life to come. And by feeding ourselves spiritually, we understand more of the meaning of this life and of the life to come and that knowledge offers peace and hope. Perhaps, I am writing this because I want to work more on my spiritual health. I need to do better at reading the scriptures and Come Follow Me and pondering on spiritual things. Regardless of what others do, I need to be a better example to my children. I am going to try harder to be a better example to my children this summer. I want to make our spiritual health a priority. And I am excited to have a new little Angel, sent straight from Heaven, in our home. Newborn babies can see into Heaven, of that I am sure. They are so wise and know so much (thus is the reason they can not talk and share it all with us) and I am excited to have another sweet little spirit in our home. I feel so very blessed for that. Now to get through the next few days. I can be brave and take it all in stride. So bring it on! Now to rest up. Goodnight then.