Dear Chris part 2

Dear Chris,

More tender mercies happened. I was mandated to work a night shift last night (after my evening shift) as the night nurse called in at 8:00 pm. Like I said in my last little note to you, it was a tender mercy having mom and dad sleep at our place last night as I did not worry about the kids in the night. Also, I was able to handle it well, just like I said in the last note. It is a good place to work. Staffing is ridiculous but the work is good and manageable. 

Dad is up and ready for the day. Now mom will watch Lizzy while I head to bed for a few hours. Then it is parent teacher interviews after school and picking the kids up from mentorship. Then maybe we will watch a movie or I will just head to an early bed if the kids allow it. 

Sometimes life seems hard to manage. But if working a double last night was manageable, and tender mercies can be recognized on top of it, life in general can be manageable too. 

love Katherine

Later on...

It is 8:50 pm and I just got Dad to bed. I am exhausted after working last night, even after sleeping hours this morning. 

I love my parents and am happy to help. I am happy they are here with us as their furnace gets fixed. 

I have been thinking about double standards in life. I don't want to be guilty of them. I am sure I am, especially when I try to cut back my kids  screen time and yet I have unlimited phone time. I need to do better. I have signed out of Facebook and don't know the password to sign back on so that is a start. I look at other people in my life and see double standards and I get confused. I can't really say more about that here or now. But it is confusing to me. 

You know I struggle with the whole work thing. My mom was mostly a stay at home mom and so was yours. But in reality, my kids probably won't be. They will most likely work alot. The baby boomer generation started the ball rolling faster for double incomes and the inflation that followed. When my kids work, they may see the double standard if I didnt /don't work as much. Everyone can handle different amounts of work and stress but I can not expect my kids to handle more than what I have to handle. I can work and do it well and not complain. I see the value in being a stay at home mom, but, I have been blessed with the job I have, even when I am mandated to work double shifts at times. 

Now off to bed

Love Katherine